Understanding
fear of intimacy and finding ways to move
past it, no matter which side of the
relationship you are on, can help you into
better relationships and a more successful
marriage advice. Intimacy does not have to
be something to pull away from. In fact, you
can consider it as being a 'raw human,' one
that is able to understand other humans on a
level that connects from our foundations of
being.
What is Intimacy?
Too often,
our society has defined intimacy in
different ways than it should be. This is
one of the major factors that have led to
the fear of being intimate with another.
Typically, our culture will state that
intimacy means being in a serious
relationship with another person. The
intimacy is something that should occur
behind closed doors, not as a public
display. Too often, intimacy has been
described as exposing oneself in ways that
are uncomfortable.
Intimacy is
more than the physical connection of
closeness and moves beyond ideas of exposure
that are too often demonstrated. Intimacy
simply means to create a connection with
another human being on a naturally human
level. It can be anything that is authentic
and genuine, creating a complete connection
between two individuals walking through
life. Intimacy is not anything but a human
connection between two individuals that
leads to better understandings of what life
is about.
Intimacy, at
its root levels, means making a connection.
When doing this, it simply takes trust. When
someone is unable to be intimate with you,
it is most likely because there is a fear of
trust. This is not necessarily happening
because of you are. It is happening because
it is a defense mechanism in order for the
other person to protect what they believe
they have or do not have. If they do not
trust someone, they do not get hurt. This
leads them into a consistent cycle of
pushing others away and keeping themselves
with their clothes on.
Fear of
intimacy for others, and maybe for yourself,
begins at the root level of not wanting to
be exposed. However, intimacy does not have
to stop at this fear. You can begin to make
changes by trusting that life is fine, even
if your clothes are off. Making small
connections with others, as well as
beginning to define what you need to do to
build levels of trust can lead you into
being able to shake off your fears and begin
to reach out to others on deeper levels.
